Comparing Country and R&B Song Titles…

SONGS ABOUT LOVE:

R&B: No One

COUNTRY: I changed her oil, she changed my life

SONGS ABOUT CHEATING:

R&B: Irreplaceable 

COUNTRY: My wife ran off with my best friend and I sure do miss him 

SONGS ABOUT BREAKING UP:

R&B: So Sick

COUNTRY: If the phone doesn’t ring, it’s me 

SONGS ABOUT SEX:

R&B: Birthday Sex

COUNTRY: I’ll marry you tomorrow but let’s honeymoon tonight

Finding Chuck Norris…

Believe it or not this is an actual search result. If you don’t believe me, type in “find chuck norris” in the google search box, then click the “I’m feeling lucky” button. The legend continues… 

Strange ways to burn 100 Calories…

1. Stay stuck in traffic for one hour.
2. Jump up and down on the bed 1,336 times.
3. Crush 623 soda cans.
4. Change 52 diapers.
5. Sleep for 2 hours.

The Three Amigos…

Like father like son… and best friend :)

Good Girls vs Bad Girls…

Good girls will loosen a few buttons when it’s hot. Bad girls will try to make it hot by loosening a few buttons. 

Good girls say, “Thanks for dinner.” Bad girls say, “What’s for breakfast?”

Good girls like Twilight. Bad girls like True Blood.

Good girls wonder why they missed their period. Bad girls wonder who made them miss their period.

Good girls go home and go to bed. Bad girls go to bed, then go home.

Celebrity Math…

Jokes your Dad might like…

Q. What do you tell a woman with two black eyes?

A. Nothing, somebody already told her twice.

Q. How many feminist does it take to change a light bulb?

A. That’s a trick question, feminists can’t change anything!

Q. How many men does it take to change a light bulb?

A. None. Let the so called “feminist” iron your clothes in the dark. 

Q. What do women and floor tiles have in common?

A. If you lay them properly the first time, you can walk all over them for life.

Say Cheese…

That’s right… Sting is way better as a solo artist!